A Romance to be Reborn
by Another Artist
Summary: I realize I never told you I loved you, but it is too late now. OneShot. Ian/Amy.


**A/N:** To purplephantasms, for no real reason except for the fact that we both like the song that inspired this story [It's You by Super Junior] :) [And this was the oneshot I was originally going to ask you to beta, remember? :)]

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><p>I guess I should have told you from the beginning. If I did, maybe you'd be standing beside me, in front of a priest and a huge audience made up of our friends and family, wearing a big smile that's rarely seen on you.<p>

Instead of you being placed inside of a mahogany casket, your peaceful face emotionless as everyone else stares with sadness obvious in their eyes.

"Ian Kabra was a great man, marked for his charismatic personality and tactful business plans."

I smile softly at the words falling from the priest's lips. I quietly wonder who wrote his speech. It sounds a lot like you did, actually. Did you plan this all out? Was this just another scheme of yours?

... What am I saying?

You're dead. It's time I start to accept that.

I listen as the man dressed in dark, mourning colors goes on about your life. I'm only hearing words, not listening to them. My thoughts wander to you.

~'~

_"You know, when you said we were going to have a fun time tonight, I wasn't exactly thinking about this." My arm was linked through Ian's as I pulled him towards the carnival.  
><em>

_"It'll be fun," I said softly, the wind carrying my voice away. The sun had already set, and the lights were on, illuminating the over-sized playground. I smiled at the memories I had with my brother when we were younger. The Ferris wheel, the merry-go-round, the bumper cars... these made up the good times of our childhood with Beatrice._

_"Hmm," Ian murmured, still unconvinced. I pulled him towards the ticket booth, where I bought the tickets for both of us, despite his arguments about not wanting to go on any of the rides._

_"I'm fairly sure they'll break down any day," he said, eying the creaking Ferris wheel._

_I smiled at him and shook my head. "Come on," I replied, walking towards the first ride: bumper cars. During the wait, I blocked out Ian's complaints about the people around us and the "horrid smell of failure and grease". When we finally approached a bumper car, Ian tried to get in._

_"Ach, why are these so small? How are my legs supposed to fit?" he muttered, stuffing himself in._

_I rolled my eyes and made my way to the next bumper car. As the bell went off and everyone went into a frenzy, hitting each other and laughing hysterically, I saw him finally. He had a small smile on his face as he hit other kids younger than us, moving around quickly. _

_When he finally caught up with me after the ride ended, he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me softly on the cheek. "That was fun," he admitted. "What next?" _

_I laughed, pulling him along.  
><em>

~'~

I wish we could go back to those days when we were both so happy. When each day felt like its own fairy-tale happy ending and all we needed was each other.

We were so stupid, so ignorant. It had never felt so good.

~'~

_After an hour of playing games and arguing over which rides to go on, we decided our last ride would be the Ferris wheel. _

_"You know, I never thought a run down city like this one could look this good," Ian said, his arm around me as the wind pushed our cart back and forth. I smiled and leaned into him. We looked out at the lights sprinkling the city, forgetting about everything and everyone except the two of us.  
><em>

_"I love you," he murmured, his lips pressed to my hair. _

_I was startled a bit, hearing this for the first time. We always knew we loved each other, but we never really said it. It was nice hearing those words drop from his lips so naturally._

_I smiled and enjoyed what was left of the night.  
><em>

~'~

Smiling felt inappropriate for this ceremony, yet I can't help it as I think of us. Still, reminiscing is nowhere as good as actually experiencing the moment. I sigh, returning back to listening to the priest's speech.

"He was a wonderful father of two beautiful children, and he will forever live in their hearts."

My eyes make their way towards the two children sitting in the front, there eyes wide as they stare confusedly at the casket. They're murmuring to each other, hushed whispers full of sad knowing.

They're just as beautiful as their parents. Poor babies... they're only seven and five.

"Now, Mrs. Kabra would like to say something."

My throat closes up.

~'~

_"I'll be getting married soon." _

_I continued scrubbing off the stain on the dish I was working on, trying my best to pretend I didn't hear that. But the words resounded off of me, putting a dent in my armor._

_"My father has already set up the date to be the first of March." _

_I gulped, wiping my forehead tiredly. "Okay," I said quietly, running the water over the dishes. "So when will you be moving out then?" _

_He sighed, pulling out a chair and leaning against the table on his elbow. Ian was dressed in casual jeans and a t-shirt, a rare sight for anyone outside of our house. His hair was a bit messy, but still managed to make him look professional and mature. He always looked so misfitted in our small, checker-tiled kitchen. _

_"I don't want to leave," he replied._

_"But you don't have a choice," I finished, pouring more soap onto the sponge quietly. "I know, Ian. Just tell me when you'll be moving out so I can help you pack." I was acting so nonchalant when all I wanted to do was scream._

_"You don't have to do that," he said softly. "I'll pack up myself." He moved to leave when I grabbed his arm, tears in my eyes. _

_"Don't go," I whispered, my voice cracking._

_He pulled me into a hug as I cried into his chest. "I'm so sorry, Amy. I'm so sorry..."_

~'~

I watch as a beautiful woman walked up to the front, tears pouring down her face. My heart clenches as I see that her usually luscious blonde hair is messed up, pulled into a bun, and that her make-up is smeared.

She really loves you, Ian.

Her nose is red, and even though it seems as if it's hard for her to speak, she begins her speech.

"I loved Ian," she says, her voice loud and strong even if she didn't appear to be. "I really did. Even if our marriage was arranged, I grew to love him. He was so cold and emotionless for a while, but he began to warm up after our first child was born. Then... I saw what everyone else saw in him." A small smile forms on her red lips. "He was so caring and nice to Karen. He always played with her whenever he could find time. He was basically the perfect father."

I sigh, agreeing. I know exactly what she means.

~'~

_I laughed as I saw another toddler step on Ian's face. His face was distorted under the kid's shoe, but he managed to pull the child up and carry him over to me. I smiled as he approached. _

_"You know, this is the reason I don't like kids," he told me, holding out the squirming three-year-old for me to hold. I laughed, taking the kid from Ian's hands. _

_"Well, you wanted to know what I did for a living," I said, elbowing him slightly. "I told you being a daycare teacher's aid wasn't easy. It's not 'sunshine and lollipops all the time' like you said." _

_He rolled his eyes at me, wiping off his slacks that had shoe prints all over them. "Funny," he muttered. "Now, when you're done with this, can we go to that dinner I was telling you about?" _

_I nodded. "But we have to wait for all of the kids to be picked up." I set down the kid so that he could go play with the others. _

_Ian groaned. "Fine," he murmured. _

_An hour passed and almost all of the kids were picked up already. There was only a pair of twins left, playing with each other in the other room. I was washing the paint brushes when I heard a crash and giggles._

_"What happened?" I asked, rushing over to the other room._

_My eyes widened as I saw the two twins, one a boy and the other a girl, playing with Ian. Even more surprising was the wide smile on Ian's face as the kids laughed and played with the blocks set out in front of them. _

_"I thought you didn't like kids," I said teasingly, helping Ian up._

_He chuckled softly. "I guess I was wrong," he responded, still staring at the two kids. If I wasn't already in love with him by then, that sealed the deal._

~'~_  
><em>

Erica continues her speech, eyes red with tears threatening to spill over again. "I miss you," she whispers, turning over to you casket. "I love you. _We_ love you. Rest in peace, love." She turns on her heels and clumsily makes her way back to her seat where her children cuddles around her.

Did you love her as much as you loved me? Or even more? I would never know, though, would I? _  
><em>

~'~

_I watched as he packed, my body numb. I stared at our pictures that he left out, knowing he wouldn't be able to take them along even if he wanted to. I sniffled, my heart aching with each shirt he packed._

_"I'll always love you," he said when he was done, sitting beside me on our bed. He leaned over to kiss the top of my head, but I moved and we ended up actually kissing. We sat there, no one moving, our lips smashed painfully together.  
><em>

_No kiss had ever been so bitter._

_"I-I'll miss you," I stammered, my vision blurred once more with warm tears._

_He smiled softly and wiped my tear away with his thumb, his hand lingering on my face. "I know." Then he stood up and left. I sat there, motionless, until I heard the engine start at the driveway._

_Then I could no longer hold in my cries._

_~'~_

I realize now that I never told you I love you. I did, I loved you with all my heart and I will never stop loving you. You are a piece of my heart, so always remember that.

I'm sorry for that.

It's time for us to go up and leave a flower on your casket. I make sure I'm one of the last people in line. I don't want anyone to recognize me here, especially with Erica and her children so close by.

As I approach your casket, a tear rolls down my cheek. I whisper, "I love you," and place a flower on your casket slowly. I refrain from staring at your face in fear that I'll burst out sobbing.

The ceremony wraps up and I leave before they can bury you. I don't want to see you put into the ground, into the dirt you hate so much. I quietly make my way out when I'm stopped by a gorgeous face.

"Erica..." I say, shocked to be confronted by her.

She smiles sadly at me, wiping her nose with her handkerchief. I spot you initials on it and sigh sadly. "Hi," she says quietly, staring at me. We had never met before, actually, but I know what she looks like because of the pictures your father sent to you before the marriage.

"Um, hi," I respond, curious as to what she wanted with me.

"Y-You're Amy, aren't you?" she asks, her eyes full of sadness. I don't know if it's because she knows who I am or because of you. Maybe it's both.

I nod, and she continues, "I know who you are. You were Ian's lover before he married me, weren't you?" Her voice was quiet, not threatening like I suspected it to be. I nod again, and she smiles sadly. "He loved you. I saw a picture of you and him in his wallet once... I think he was trying to hide it, but I saw it. I recognized your hair immediately once I saw you stand up."

My eyes widen at the thought of our picture in your wallet. I thought you left all your pictures in our old house. "He-He did?" I ask softly, thinking of you.

She nods, then reaches into her purse and takes out a worn-out wallet. She opens it up and shows me the picture, and my heart breaks at the sight of it. It's us, in front of our house when we first bought it. Our neighbor offered to take it, remember?

~'~

_"Definitely not something I'm proud of," Ian said, eying the older styled house we had just bought together. "But it's our first, isn't it?" He looked over at me and smiled._

_I nodded, smiling back at him. "I like it," I told you matter-of-factly. "It's homey." _

_He rolled his eyes. "Homey, eh?" _

_"Yup, and it's not too big, unlike the other one we saw," I said, referring back to the mansion Ian had insisted on seeing earlier during our house hunt. He laughed at the memory, pulling me to his side. We stood there, gazing up at our house._

_It was then when our neighbor walked over and saw us standing there. _

_"What a beautiful, young couple," she said, smiling at us. "Are you two newlywed?" _

_I laughed and shook my head. "We're still dating, ma'am." _

_"Wow, and yet you've already bought a house together?" she asked, astonished. _

_We nodded, and she smiled at us. "Would you two like me to take a picture of you both?" _

_I thought about it for a moment then nodded. "That'd be great. Thank you," I told her, smiling as I reached into my bag to give her the camera. _

_"It's no problem," she told me, taking the camera from me. "You two are just so good-looking together. Now say cheese!" _

_We both smiled as the woman snapped the picture, freezing this perfect moment in time._

_~'~_

"I thought you might like it back," she says quietly, handing it to me. "It's a beautiful picture."

I nod, slowly taking it. "If-If you want it... why don't you keep it?"

She laughs softly. "As much as I love him in this photo, I can't bear to stand the thought of him with someone else." She looks up at me, and smiles apologetically. "Sorry. It's just a reflex of mine now."

I understand, nodding once as I put the wallet into my bag. I make my way to leave when she stops me.

"Did you... Did you two ever see each other after the marriage?" she asks, and I could tell she is a little scared to hear the answer.

But when I shake my head, she breathes out a sigh of relief. "I was just... curious. I know he really loved you," she finally says, staring at me. "I'm going to go now. It was nice finally meeting you, Amy." She attempts to smile but it's lost under grief.

"Yeah, it is," I say, smiling back sadly. "Goodbye." She leaves, walking towards the graveyard with her children in tow.

I play with the wallet in my bag and think about her words. We never did meet after your marriage. We wanted to, but we couldn't.

~'~

_"This is... the last time we'll be seeing each other, won't it?" I asked, pulling back from his hug. "I'm... I'm happy you came back, though, one last time." _

_"I wish things could be different," he said, his words oozing resentment at our future. "We should just run away," he offered, smiling sadly at me. "No one will ever find us." _

_Despite the situation being humorless, I laughed softly. "They'll always find us," I said quietly. _

_Ian sighed. "I wish we weren't ourselves. I wish we could be someone else, someone without responsibilities and duties. Two carefree people who can fall in love easily." I wasn't used to Ian's wishful thoughts - he rarely spoke of them - but hearing them only broke what was left of my heart even more._

_"If only," I agreed, leaning against his chest one last time. "I won't forget this." _

_"We'll be together forever," he said, his words a promise that he couldn't keep. "If not physically, emotionally. I can't forget us." _

_"Forever..." I whispered. "Even if we're reborn again." _

_He pulled away slowly, and I let my arms fall to my side. "We'll meet in another life." He managed one last smile as he kissed the top of my head and then walked away for the last time. _

~'~_  
><em>

I realized that I never told you I love you. I'm sorry, because if I did, maybe we wouldn't be here. Just know that I love you more than anything else. I'll meet you in our next life.

You'll wait for me, won't you?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I hope you guys understand that their ages are around the forties, aha. It's still an early death for Ian, but it's not as early as the twenties. It has a flashback sort of format like "Four Shattered Pieces". Just as bittersweet, even. In fact... now that I think about it, the two could easily be considered sequels has "Four Shattered Pieces" not mentioned that Ian had broken off his marriage in that oneshot. But yeah, they're very similar.

This genre is so contradicting. I have fluff at times, then angst. It's an evil type of writing.

In the flashbacks, I refer to Ian as himself, but in the narration, I refer to Ian as "you". Sorry for that -.-" I just kind of like to put flashbacks in the first person POV, while the narration goes to a sort of second POV/first person POV.

This was started a long time ago but I kind of... lost it, in a way. I just lost what I was thinking about, but coming back to it, I was ready to just finish this. Ah, so... yeah. Not exactly proud of this, because I feel as if I over-exaggerated some feelings (alas, I have never been in love so I don't know how love can change a person).

Please point out any mistakes you stumble across. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed. (I found myself missing Amian, therefore this was posted.)

_(It wasn't until I went back to It's You's music video with English subs that I realize how appropriate that song is! Honestly, I almost forgot, because I was basing this mostly off of one part only, but looking at all of the lyrics... it makes sense! xD Seriously, you should look up Super Junior's It's You with English subs. It's an amazing song and it matches well with this.)_


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